an outcome

Our email inquiry with our agency last night came back with the stomach emptying question: what phone number is the best to reach you?

And after 40 minutes of question, answer and utter shock we found out that the current status of our case is ridiculously far from where we thought it would be, even could be...

So, the back story:
Our home study reads that we are ready for/ will accept a child 0-3 years of age at referral.
Our I-800A (the 1st provisional approval from USCIS, of sorts) approval reads 0-3 years.
Note the lack of specificity.

And the not-so-surprising twist:
During our provisional interview, a consular official in our Embassy in Bulgaria has decided that these do not match, and deduced that Nikolas will be 4 years old by the time of our final visa interview. (Just to keep things a little straight in a world where 2+2=5: the Embassy is part of the Department of State, not Department of Homeland Security, so they don't have to listen to each other, like each other, coordinate, play nice, or anything else)

In at least 3 other cases where our agency has dealt with this sort of issue, USCIS has "simply" changed THEIR own verbiage on the I-800A approval form. Our officer there (different than the idiot above) told our director that she would have to consult with her supervisor before making such a change without an update to the home study.(likely a 3-4 month process) She also offered up some choice lip about why we didn't catch this last year. And in a separate breath said that the Embassy should refer back to the home study. But they don't have to play nice. Nor do they have to talk to each other to get the changes they "want" - since CLEARLY the source paperwork is just fine.

More back story on this point:

• the age consideration information in our home study is on the first page, in the first and only 5 line paragraph on the first page, in the FIRST sentence!!!!! It's hardly buried...
• the home study is the key source document, arguably the most important source document representing our interests and capacity, for nearly every stage of the adoption process and figures into every decision made by officials in both governments; most other documents are derivative.
  
• One of the jobs of the consular official is to review our case, including our home study for errors and to rejudge our compatibility with Nikolas. They must read it, because they can't make their decisions based on the decisions of their "rival" government branch (USCIS/Department of Homeland Security).
  

Which should be as simple as: we matched at referral. We match now. OF COURSE he going to age as this process drags on. Where is the common sense??? Where is the humanity?

This smacks of ulterior motive: political, personal value, ego seeking power/control, etc. This kind of decision-making shows up in countries where stalling paperwork is a great way to earn extra money from a bribe.

and when Donna was crying this morning, Tam asked "why?" Barry explained that people were trying to keep us from his brother. Tam immediately replied, in a low, serious, almost growl-ly voice: "Me yell at them, tell them to let me see my brother."

So, we are refitting our Vietnam mental battle armor, with a big alteration: we are trying to tame the anger beast at least enough to remain loving for Tam. Our faith that this will all work out is NOT in question. But we know that we cannot be idle because our relationship with Nikolas is threatened. So, we welcome actionable advice :-| (grimly determined face) and your prayers for our serenity, strength and wisdom and the warming of hearts of a few choice government employees :-} (shaky smiley face)